Jonathan Cainer Zodiac Forecasts

April 26th to April 30th 2004

MONDAY April 26
Two comets comment

Did you see the night sky this weekend? The Moon, Mars and Venus were shining quite spectacularly, as were Jupiter and Saturn. I had the fascinating experience of gazing at them from Australia one night and then seeing them again in England, the next. The weirdest sight was the Moon. Down-under, the crescent points RIGHT. Here, it points LEFT! I had to look three times before I realised it was neither jet lag, nor false memory syndrome... but real, visible proof that the northern hemisphere is different to the southern one. I was in Australia because, as keen astronomers will know, if you are now in the right part of the world and willing to get up very early and scour the horizon, you may be in with a chance of seeing one of the TWO comets that are now visible with the naked eye. I say 'may' because so far, despite my efforts, I have only managed to see one of the comets. That's frustrating because, as far as I know, it has NEVER before in history been possible to see two at the same time. But as it should soon be possible to view both from the UK, I'll keep looking. On the plane back, I kept thinking about what 'twin comets' might symbolise. Spookily, when I arrived in London, I received an invitation to go to the theatre... and see a play called 'TWO!' This brilliantly performed drama got me thinking. Those twin comets must augur well for couples who want to deepen their relationships and for singles who want to become part of a pair! I also suspect that actual twins, who sometimes experience a lot of telepathic contact, may have some stunning moments of mental communication soon. I also think there'll soon be a lot of drama on the world stage... but I don't want to say more till I have actually seen both comets with my own eyes. Phenomena like this need to be observed before they are interpreted. To give myself the chance to focus on this quest, I am taking a brief break from this page. Your forecasts, this week, are being written by my esteemed colleague, Eric Francis. Normally, as regular readers will know, I get different writers to fill in for me each day. Recently though, I have become very impressed with Eric's exceptional abilities. He speaks the language of the stars most eloquently and come to that, his English is pretty good too... even if he IS American! Give his style a day or two to grow on you and then please, let me know what you think.

ERIC FRANCIS writes...People have lots of reasons for reading the newspaper such as dependable information, obsession, masochism or a good laugh. But unless you're a star, politician, infamous character or royal, there's only one page where you expect to read something about yourself. You're currently turned to that page. Astrology has the gift of looking beyond the madness of the world and remembering that your life matters. You have human concerns and personal needs. True, astrologers look to some odd places to sniff out what you've got on your mind, and only you know if we've got a vague clue. Personally, I like to think it's the thought that counts.

TUESDAY April 27
Astrology is the great equaliser by Eric Francis

Jonathan is away. Your daily forecasts this week are written by Jonathan's colleague, Eric Francis, a Seattle-based astrologer and essayist. Eric writes, a fascinating twice-weekly horoscope and news service covering astrology, personal growth, environmental issues and political affairs. Eric blends astrology with investigative journalism and personal narrative to create a humorous, alive, and even responsible news source unique in the world.
Eric writes: No matter who or what you are, you have a chart. No matter what chart you have, it has all the same basic elements as everyone else's. Whether you're Bush, Bono, Bjork or Blair, astrology is the great equaliser. We are currently passing through a series of days that crank up the intensity in the world, and in everyone's personal world. Deep stuff is percolating to the surface, and a cosmic zit is about to pop. While you have the option to act nonchalantly and convince yourself that nothing is happening, you know better. This is the time to say what you have to say and be open about what you see and feel. Let the pressure off. You'll feel a lot better.
Astrologers aren't politicians by Eric Francis

Jonathan is away - ERIC FRANCIS is writing your daily forecasts this week. Eric writes, a unique blend of astrology, investigative journalism and personal narrative.
Eric writes: I am waiting to open up a horoscope column for the first time and read something like: "ARIES: I've been staring at this chart for half an hour and I haven't a damn clue what to say to you. Mars, your ruling planet, isn't making any aspects today, and the Moon, which is generally stirring up something, is somehow avoiding all your interesting houses at once. Check back tomorrow please. Have a good day." You never see that. Astrologers aren't politicians. We can't say, "No comment." Fortunately, charts do get more interesting one day after the next, almost perversely so. Or maybe it's astrologers who slowly grow more twisted as the years go by. No comment...
The Horoscope is an undeveloped medium by Eric Francis

Jonathan is away - ERIC FRANCIS is writing your daily forecasts this week. To find out more about Eric Francis's unique blend of astrology, investigative journalism and personal narrative, you can visit his website at
Eric writes: The horoscope is an undeveloped medium. I think it would work better taken out of the hands of mere writers and given to film directors and other truly creative people. For example, we could have the Alfred Hitchcock horoscope, which would be more terrifying each minute, but undeniably brilliant. The Fellini horoscope would apply to only 8 1/2 hours of your day. In the Warhol version, every sign's forecast would be identical, with just one syllable changed. You would need to partially strip before reading the incredibly vulgar "Last Horoscope in Paris." Michael Moore's horoscope would be based on ambush video footage of your private life. In "Sex, Lies and Horoscopes," you would confess everything to the astrologer. The Dali horoscope would create extra signs and days of the week. In the Beatles horoscope, the words would have to be read backwards for their true meaning. The Tony Blair horoscope would be based on imaginary or non-existent charts.
Site update: Click here to read this weeks article from Rupert Sheldrake.
FRIDAY April 30
Mercury retrograde comment by Eric Francis

Jonathan is away - ERIC FRANCIS is writing your daily forecasts this week. Eric writes, a unique blend of astrology, investigative journalism and personal narrative.
Eric writes: At 13.05GMT (2.06pm BST) this morning London time, mighty Mercury stationed direct in Aries, ending the three-week retrograde. Mercury is retrograde three times a year. Three times it appears to stop, then go backwards. Three times it appears to stop and go forward. Today is one of those go-forward days. It may feel like tension breaking, like contact is made, or like something is resolved. Or you may just feel stressed or confused. If so, easy does it.
I usually lose my keys a lot with Mercury retrograde. That didn't happen (yet), but one morning (obviously seeking greater things in life) I lost my whole car - challenging, given that it's a large gold '89 Buick. I did so even remembering the junction where I parked, but didn't trust my memory. After walking around for 45 minutes, I finally called a cab and explained my situation to the driver. Imagine my surprise when he said: "I love you for doing this," and proceeded to share his simple, elegant philosophies of life as he drove me around till we found my car.
Some call Mercury the planet of communication. I think of it as the planet of consciousness. In Aries, we get a picture of self-awareness. In honour of this event, today's forecasts are focused on the question of identity. "Who am I?" changes with time, as does the answer. That's the nice thing about growth, or at least about being unstable. Today I'll be looking at the question from the standpoint of the 12 signs based on the current sky. Remember, astrology is a kind of fiction. Nobody else can tell you who you are or what you need. These are merely proposals.
Site Update: To read Bernard Fitzwalter's article on May Day click here... Enjoy.


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